I had a really important, reflective dream the other night but I can't quiet put my finger on it. It had two vital male roles and I was sandwiched in the middle. Put on full make up coverage and it didn't feel sticky like how it does with my other make up. Not sure why this is the only product that works for me? There's a Japanese reunion at Sensei's house next month for those who went on the trip to Japan and obviously the brat's going to be there. Been pondering about confrontation and just simply being civil. I always choose the route of being civil but I always have this question in the back of my mind. Maybe I just seek closure, maybe I just seek a chance to justify myself, or maybe I'm just hurt by what I thought was friendship. Oh boy, there will always be questions on why what happened, happened but you can only keep moving forward and accept that people come and go. You can only treasure those with us today. Mama wants me to go back to Vietnam this lunar new year but I really don't want to. I should wait until I'm at least 21 years of age or until my eyes have stayed the same degree for three years. Going back now would only mean missed classes and result in a lower chance of a 5 on my exams for college credit. She nagged about our how grandparents are getting older and how sick they are which I understand but going back and getting into heated tension and spending time where I don't want to be with only make everything awkward and tense. I have no friends and I cannot stand my cousins and aunts, or just Vietnamese people in general. I'm not going to get raped or be stupid and bring boys over. I've travel to a foreign country millions of miles away alone before and I didn't die or get raped. I can handle myself.
