Just in case I won't get to see you again. I wanted to let you know: I appreciate everything we've gone through together, everything we've shared, and thank you. You were my best friend, someone who I truly thought I would spend the rest of my life with. I had my time of being a spoiled brat who always wanted your attention 24/7. We grew tired of each other and things fell apart. We're still unable to fully be comfortable and be the friends we once were in the beginning because there are still feelings of anger and resentment from the past. There's still uncertainty and awkwardness in the tense atmosphere, there's still worries that things from the past might resurface. I was a bit down when you were unable to hang out on Wednesday because I just wanted to let get this off my chest. I just wanted to spend some time with you. I know I'm a big baby that gets offended too easily, always crying and shedding unnecessary tears. There are times when I catch myself wanting to call or text you just to communicate and see how you're doing but I know it'll be hopeless because there would be no effort in trying to keep the conversation going. I urge myself to turn away and occupy my mind. I'm trying to get better. As days, weeks, months pass I'm still struggling to move on, to stop thinking about the past. I'm gradually getting there. Have your wounds healed? It seems as though they heal faster than mine. I'll try to keep this short of mushiness. I hope we could someday be friends again. One day, I'll have moved on and we'll be able to look back on this as an experience to learn from. One day, I'll be a real mother. One day, it'll happen and we will be better off.
