Came home from work last night, washed up and went over to a family friend's house for lẩu, consisting of lamb, beef, shrimp balls, shrimp, soft tofu, mushroom, bok choy, and noodles. Watched sailor moon for a majority of the time until they started karaoking which I then retreated to a corner by an outlet to text like an antisocial. Left around 11PM so I spent a good 5 - 6 hours awkwardly by myself. Woot. Had an odd dream. Been watching surgeries lately so that may be why I had such an odd dream. Dreamt that I got the male - female surgery and then I had intercourse. Gotta say, that was the suckiest intercourse I had ever had. There was also this split universe in my basement as well. There was a raised stage and there was a switch where it changed the universe. It accidentally been switched to the evil one and the family I saw was creepily horrific. They were in rags and had blood all over them, possessed or so with crazy eyes. They were limping towards me, almost getting off the stage so I had to frantically change the setting to a nice, peaceful Christian family lol. Then somehow I was in the streets of Vietnam and there was huge bubble balls that covered about 10x10 sq ft all over the city. The world was coming to an end and everyone took shelter inside these bubbles and they were scattered along side sidewalks and roads as well. Odd. I was separated from my family and the kids along with some other kids who I looked after? Anywhos, woke up. Made tuna sandwich, watched sailor moon. Made brownie cake with chocolate chip(the brownie has a cake texture rather than the typical spongy texture brownies have). Andi came home from Bac Phung's house, cuddled, and snacked on brownies. Afterwards I was sent outside to go fry the eggrolls in the cold without socks. Brrrr.
Talked to the other side and it was going alright I guess. Was still upset that they went against my heeding but whatever - I told em so. Then mom comes outta nowhere telling me to tell Dudley to back off and all that or else she's gonna call the police and all that because he started IMing and commenting on Ami's posts. Wth? It's just regular talk, weather talk! I have no place and neither does she to interfer with their relationship/friendship. Yeah, she's married and she's unhappy as well. So duh. I told her to wait, she's still in school and have little siblings under her plus an uncle and two aging parents to be concerned with instead of a husband who she hardly knew! I didn't mind them having feelings for each other, I'm just saying they should've waited and see how it goes instead of rushing in. Of course he's gonna be all sweet towards you when he's courting you but afterwards yes the guy will change and there will be less affection, that's why you wait and find out more about him before jumping in and tying the knot. I been through all that shit and phase. I may be younger but I am wise in the area of love and boys beyond my mother and sister. I've been through all that shit, I know what to avoid and what to expect so listen before you get fucken hurt than complain. Then mama continued to trash me because I wouldn't succumb to her bidding of calling Dudley out. Got so piss and tired, didn't wanna argue so I hung up. No, I am not worthless because I won't do this nor are you gonna die. If we hitch up with the wrong guys it's our mistakes for either listening and being pressured by everyone around us or cause we're too blind by what we thought was love. So many of my relationships don't work out because of these parental things. SMH. Another major reason why I don't want to get involved with guys. Even if they introduce me to a dude, and say hey I give you my blessing wholeheartedly! I don't give a fuck. I don't know who the fuck the guy is and I don't love him either. I don't want to love any guy romantically. Too much shit with your family is involved, especially when they make themselves your priority. So, best thing is to just stay single and focus on your education like I had said. If there's mutual feelings, then great. Just wait it out and see our the friendship goes instead of rushing in and now his "affection" has died off and leaves you in the middle of the night and doesn't return. Yes, he's not going to kiss your forehead nor hold your hand in public anymore. It's because he didn't love you - at least not yet. Love takes time, love takes effort, love takes pain, struggles, and sacrifice. If you haven't invested any of those than it's not love.
